I think during this election season it is important to recall the history of the Presidency itself. And so, test your skills:
1. Which President died in office?
- Andrew “Old Hickory” Jackson
- Grover “Old Spice” Cleveland
- Lyndon “Old Hissy Fit” Johnson
- Warren “Old Dead” Harding
2. Who signed the Declaration of Independance?
- George Washington (even though he wasn’t there)
- Abraham Lincoln (via time machine)
- Declaratin’ Jim (but he signs everything)
- That’s not how you spell independence
3. What is the difference between a President and a Prime Minister?
- Star Spangled Banner
- Liberty and Justice For ALL
- Amurrka! (shoots gun in air)
- USA USA USA
4. Which Presidential bio-pic are you going to see this holiday season?
- Taft: Return to the Bathtub
- FDR: Hell on Wheels
- Benjamin Harrison: It’s All About the Benjamins
- Hoover and Kumar go to White Castle
5. Which was the most scandalous?
- Trailoftearsgate (what do you mean no impeachment for this one?)
6. Pick the famous quote:
- Four Score and Seven Years Ago blah blah bloo blah blah
- The only thing to fear is - oh my god!! What’s that behind you?!! haha j/k lol
- I am not a cookbook
- Ask not what your country can do for you, thank you, no more questions
7. Whose election campaign slogan was the best?
- Buchanan 1857 “Probably Gay, Your Great-Great-Grandchildren Will Think That’s Pretty Awesome”
- Adams 1797 “We Built This City on Rock ‘n Roll” (followed by sick harpsichord riff)
- McKinley 1897 “The Unsinkable Ship”
- Roosevelt 1901 “I’ll Wrestle You For It”
8. What Presidential haircut are you going to get:
- The Franklin Pierce Side Part, even more to the side
- The Van Buren Mushroom Cloud
- The Jackson Pouf
- No cut, gonna wig it up old school like Washington
Please circle all your answers and submit your papers via Bald Eagle. Please complete this test while weeping Tears of Liberty or your answers will be disqualified.
Kate Beaton is queen of my heart.